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Woo Woo Class 101
Last week I was out riding my road bike by
myself out in the country. It was early evening and I was heading home on a
beautiful stretch of road that if not for the white trash that lived along
it, it would fit nicely into Sunset Magazine. Maybe the Editors could be
talked into an article that explained how "They" live.
I was tooling along nicely. I tried not to
use the word tool as it would get fouled up in my story but at this
point its all I've got. As I was riding towards this house that was set back
about 40 feet from the road. I saw that there was a middle age woman dressed
in her "I've given up on life" yard work clothing. She was standing at the
bottom of the porch steps with a green watering hose, dousing her plants.
She was completely oblivious of her shirtless trashbucket spouse two steps
above her with his wanger out shaking it at her, going woo woo.
Just as I sped into his field of vision
(not dreams), he quickly floundered to put his trout back into his waders.
Just as quickly as his God given guilt told him to hide his Herring, the
Brotherhood of Man took over and he continued woo wooing with it
in one hand and waved at me with the other. I raised my fist in the air,
"right on brother"!!!! The woman was oblivious or probably could have cared
less.
Ladies........this is what we do. Baby
boys in the cradle will practice the woo woo sound! You could place
any man in the world on those steps and except for the Ken Doll he would
have performed the same ritual. Even if it was going unnoticed or
acknowledged!
We even all know how to make truck
sounds!!!!!
© 2005 Charlie Meehan |